Elevated State of Mind
Last month Two months ago my good friend Ace and I hopped on a flight bound for San Francisco, ready to meet up with some of our closest friends. Despite my best efforts, I had set exciting expectations about hanging out in the Bay: reconnecting with the people I hadn’t seen in over a year, forming new friendships, and of course pedaling down some fresh pavement (the keyword here being “down” because Chicago is so damn flat…)
What I didn’t expect were the emotions that would hit me as soon as I boarded the plane – feelings of uncertainty. In addition to the literal “ups and downs” of flying, I realized as we climbed into the clouds that this turbulent time in my life was a perfect parallel. A move from Nashville back to Chicago certainly uprooted me from any sense of a comfort zone, and combined with a few other big life events, my mood had been slightly off. With the near two year delay in posts, I’ve been going back and forth on what I want Main//Frame to look like as well…
The metaphor of taking a flight relates strongly to what I’ve been going through in this chapter of flux. Having a change in elevation, (whether it be in a plane, on the bike, or in my mood) has been a valuable, albeit stressful part of the process that is helping me chart a clearer course towards a stable future. There have been plenty of highs and lows, but I hope by reflecting on the trip with you that maybe we can all arrive at cruising altitude.
Seatbelt Sign: ON
I suppose I should quickly set the scene with some examples of all these changes I keep mentioning: The relocation back to Chicago was the beginning, and obviously one of the most prominent. Suddenly my surroundings were all new again, and being unfamiliar meant I was feeling excited and scared all in a single breath. Despite having lived here previously, transitioning to Chicago for a second time held plenty of new challenges. Combined with the growth I had experienced personally over the past year, I felt like I was starting fresh.
Second on the list were the changes in my health. Stomach issues have been a serious part of my life since being diagnosed with norovirus at the beginning of 2020, and the jump to the Windy City certainly had an effect. Luckily exercise has the double-edged effect of keeping me in routine as well as introducing me to new friends, but these complications are still something I am working through.
Next up are some examples I hadn’t even anticipated writing about at the time I started drafting this in August, but which ironically ended up being some of the biggest learning lessons in the season of change. Heading back to my place from SF I discovered the building was infested with bed bugs and I had to move. In the same month as my apartment search my work started doing lay offs. While I ultimately got to keep my job, and I’m typing this in a new place that feels more like home than I could have imagined, both my personal and professional lives were undoubtedly flipped upside down.
The final illustration, and the one which ties the article together has to be the transformation of my community. It was a bittersweet and tough decision I made to move away from my best friends in Nashville, and to be willingly farther away from my parents in Atlanta, but I’m using all of those wonderful relationships as a foundation of reference for creating community in a new environment. Above all, I’m thankful for all of their support.
It was a hectic and thrilling time moving in the heat of the Chicago summer, and among the frenzy I felt having a friendly vacation would be the perfect way to sign off for the season. To make it even more special, I brought the one tool that keeps me the most constant in the midst of change: my bike.
Keep Your Head Up
The ritual of riding is something I can always rely on to bring peace, and from my newfound love for the sport back in 2020 cycling has allowed consistency among uncertain growth. The key to consistency has been the ability to track my numbers on Strava. “Why am I feeling off?” Well my hours this week are kind of low, I should start there and figure it out.
These lessons transcend time in the saddle however. Having a clear state of mind left me open to living in the moment. Being regulated physically and mentally through riding meant I wasn’t held back my what I wanted to do or where I wanted to go; and in the 5 days I was visiting SF, we went all over…
I was even fortunate tag along for a ride with fantastic photog, all around awesome human, and that day “local tour guide” Christopher Strickland (or Creedub on Instagram).
Later that weekend me, Ace, my childhood (we’re still kinda children) best friend Connor, and his team all traveled together up to Marin. We continued over to Hawk Hill, down to Pacifica, and beyond; All the while, our conversations covering equal ground. We navigated topics about respect, being a good friend, and growth. We talked mostly about how important it is to have a network to share this kind of environment with.
Heighten the Senses
The most important role I could take in any of these conversations was that of a teammate. Active listening is the skill of the sport, honesty is the style, and questioning or challenging my friends when I felt I needed to meant we were ultimately working together to reach a common goal: growth.
Running with the team metaphor for a moment: The team practices challenges each day as they come up and you have to use a strategy of asking others for help. One morning you could wake up and your car could have been totaled overnight (true story) and in that moment hopefully you have a support network strong enough to hold you, however heavily you need to lean. Beyond that case, I can think of plenty of other beautiful examples of my friends helping others around them. They’re probably too humble to know who they are, but trust me I tell them each chance I get.
Cycling eclipsed a form of physical travel and transformed into a vehicle used to form deeper connection. These types of relationships have been the most important aspect of my life post pandemic, and I clearly have the bike to thank in part.
In an attempt to build a team here in Chicago, I am constantly sharing stories about interesting things others have talked about recently. Since the trip, I have taken every moment to expand on these discussions with anyone who will listen (mostly on a bike given A) that’s where I spent a lot of time and B) we’re riding so where you gonna go?). Together, we end up building a world view, and lately I feel like I got the window seat.
Seatbelt Sign: OFF
I can’t help but feel like this incomplete somehow. These ideas are still kind of big to me, and they are also recent. Speaking from the heart I am still figuring a lot of it out, but I am loving this process to death.
To the idea of something missing: it might just be you. I encourage you to leave a comment here, because what I have left out could be found in continuing the chat..
Ultimately, with Main//Frame I want to create a network that can connect whenever they want.
Thank you to Connor, Hayden, and Eran for being such nice young handsome men. I appreciate you hosting me and letting me build bikes in your living room.
Thank you Ace for being the best travel buddy.
To all my other friends reading this: thank you for taking the time to be here. I love you.
D//F
MAIN//FRAME 